goodeveningeurope

Russian baboushkas FTL

In previous years, review, Russia on May 5, 2012 at 18:23

This happens ever so often (or in our opinion way too often) in Eurovision: A bunch of weirdos disguised as folk musicians show up and sprinkle their fairy dust from last century. They’re often old enough to have founded a cheese or something and dressed in whatever they managed to steal from the British museum who in turn stole it from their mother who never used it in the first place.

Of course, media loves them. ‘Look at the weirdos from a lunatic place far, far away from us’, they would write, and the number of views on YouTube would raise by hundreds of thousands. And of course, the hipsters love them even more. ‘Look, here’s something no one likes, so we should totally dig it’, they would write in their personal, handwritten letter to Zoey Deschanel, who decides to invite the gang over for her private reception in her LA loft, which of course sets off their YouTube numbers to the most inappropriate.

Still it is all a bunch of crap. Let’s just call a spade a dirty shovel and admit what this year’s Russian entry really is: Five grandmothers and one great grandmother who try so hard to make the best out of the situation. The situation being that they cannot  sing and cannot perform and don’t have a faintest idea why they are on stage dressed in the fall 2009 collection of Romania’s tourist shops and accompanied by a most horrible beat by Moscow’s equivalent of David Guetta while they show us how they really really love each other. For that stamina they oughta be granted a thankyou. For everything else, let’s just say forgetaboutit. It sucks, and not a million hipsters in St. Petersburg will be able to prove us wrong.

So nope, no weirdo sympathy from us here. Please wrap up your baboushka and hand it back to Kate Bush, Russia. And bring us some hot guys, like you used to.

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  1. I’m not sure why, but I get the feeling you guys aren’t fans of this one???
    I don’t feel as strongly about it as you do, but I am also not a fan. The song the grannies had in the Russian final a few years ago was better. I am glad they’ll get to build their church or whatever it is they want to do, but is that really the right motivation for going to Eurovision (or for people to vote someone to go to Eurovision)? The granny gimmick might get them to the final, but I don’t know where they’ll end up after that.
    PS – If Russia wins with this I will die.

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