goodeveningeurope

Stories from the Romanian desert

In previous years, review, Romania on May 11, 2012 at 15:59

What do you get when you cross Scotland with Finland, dress them up in a glamor model and let them have a jolly good time in Dubai? Apparently Romania:

Not that we disapprove. The first 30 seconds of this is even very promising in our opinion. But it gets worse from there, and that is usually a problem. What is also a common problem, is when you are stuck at work wishing you were at home nurturing your hangover head and the filthy nerves that go with it and suddenly hear a song you forgot you put on and start getting all the wrong ideas. Like:

  • What happened? Did all the seniors from all Western Oslo high schools decide to celebrate their graduation inside my computer?
  • Oh, shit, no, could I actually have been teleported to Ayia Napa where there’s a disco going on that I do NOT want to be a part of in any way?
  • Someone is very happy with thei Zaleleleleleleleilah and there is a hole in my head that continues to grow and if the lady doesn’t stop soon, I’ll be fruitcake. Forever.
  • And why is she so happy anyway? Did she get new boobs for her birthday? And is her birthday the reason why she changes her dress every quarter of a second?
  • Wait, will she do those dress changes in Baku as well? That must be soooo tiresome.
  • And didn’t Paula Seling use to be inside that catsuit? WHAT did you do to her?

And so on. You know how it goes, and how well it does not end. Guess Romania just hit us on the wrong day. But we’re not entirely sure they would have been better off on another. This is all straight ethno pop from yet another plastic lady, and Eurovision could soon do with a direction away from that.

But do not dispare. All those teenagers celebrating their graduation and their first vacation to Ayia Napa will love you. And you did get a free trip to Dubai. Try not to be caugt for indecent exposure while you’re there, hon.

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